Recipes for Living Isaac and Frances Barr

The current United Methodist structure was built in 1967, but there are still persons who have fond memories of the former building on the corner of Cass and Main and of the people who attended. The King's Daughters Sunday School class began in the old building and is still a strong fellowship: One of the faithful members, as long as she was able, was Frances Barr. Her daughter-in-law asked her to write her story, which follows:

On this day in March 2001, I take pen in hand to write a report of my life. I, Frances R. Whitehead Barr, was born on a farm northeast of Silver City, Mills County, Iowa on January 9, 1919. I had three older brothers and one younger than I, and four older sisters. We moved to a farm one mile north of where I was born and lived there for 14 years, more or less. We rented the farm owned by Mr. Bergoine.

I don't remember much about my infant life. What I remember first is going to country school when I was about five years old. I was a shy and bashful child. Seems as though I would not answer the teacher, so she put me on the stairs down to the basement of the school building. It was dark on those stairs and I suppose I cried, for when I got home and my brothers and sisters told the folks, they took me out for another year.

After starting to school and growing older, I helped with the work, inside and out. Outside I fed chickens, gathered eggs, mowed the yard with a hand-push mower. (It was a big yard, too.) I would get the milk cows to and from the pasture, and as the years went by I helped milk the cows.

I went to this country school for eight years. I didn't pass the seventh grade and had to take it the next year. We were about 2 ¼ miles from our country school and usually walked. When my older brothers and sisters got into high school, they would drive us younger kids to within ¼ mile of our school. Sometime during my grade school years, the neighbors started to have square dances. These were usually on weekends. Maybe there would be two or three square dances and then a round dance.

I went into Silver City High School in the fall of 1934. I don't remember how I got there as my sister Annie, just older than I, graduated in the spring of 1934. I do remember staying in town one year and also riding a saddle horse, putting him in a stable in town, then walking to the school house.

In my junior year we moved to a farm farther northeast, near Henderson, Iowa. There was a lane from the main road to the house-it might have been ¼-mile that my brother Donald and I walked to catch the school bus to Henderson High School. The house we lived in had a faulty chimney and sometime while we lived there, our house burned down. The local fire department was called but got there too late. The neighbor and my brothers carried out things from the first floor and tossed things out of the upstairs window. The bedsteads were bent and crooked. The washhouse and garage were saved, so our family lived in those until we moved in March 1941. The garage was across the driveway from the washhouse, and that was the bedroom for some of us. Eventually two rooms were built onto the washhouse. "We" were Dad, Mom, Mae, Donald and myself.

I graduated from Henderson High School in 1938. My sister, Mae, thought I should go to Omaha, Nebraska to finish my secretarial course. I began but war was declared, and I went home in the fall of 1942. I didn't finish my schooling. Then I really helped with the chores. I also ·helped three families, taking care of the mother, baby, and household.

In March 1941, we moved to a farm in Clarke County, east and south of Lacelle, Iowa. Moving was complicated by the mud. Everything was loaded into several trucks that had to travel the muddy lane to get to the gravel road but there was also mud at Lacelle and a steep hill that had to be climbed. Taking all that into account, the move was made during the night while the mud was still slightly frozen, and we went west ¼ mile, turned south for one mile, back east one mile, and south to the farm.

This is where I met Isaac Barr. He came to the house looking for my brother Donald. We began dating. He gave me an engagement ring at Christmas, 1944.

We did not have electricity in those days. We had kerosene lamps to read by and do school homework. These lamps had to be filled with kerosene every day, the wicks cleaned and the glass chimneys washed. For outdoor work after dark, we used lanterns which also had to be taken care of in the same way. My mother, sister Mae, and I made homemade soap.

In 1942, while taking care of the babies, Isaac asked me to marry him. We were married in a lawn wedding on August 19, 1945. Our honeymoon trip was on an Indian motorcycle to Wyoming. We had a great time.

During our married life we lived in two houses, built the third house, changed houses with Isaac's parents for the fourth house. Isaac didn't farm so we bought a house east of Osceola and moved in June 1960. That makes house number five where we have lived ever since. We moved Isaac's mother and the four-room house onto our acreage, and she lived there until she went to the nursing home. I would love to build a new house on these ten acres.

On this 13th day of April, 2002, I will try to write Isaac's history. Isaac Henry Barr was born on June 27, 1922. His parents are George and Anna E. McMurtrey Barr. He was born at home. He had a younger brother, but he died when only a few days old.

Isaac attended rural school, Knox #5, about one mile north of his home. During his school years, he rode a pony to school. During his early teen years, he was kicked by a horse, giving him an injury to his left hip. He was in a body cast for 1 ½ years. The injury kept him from playing sports. He was in 4-H for a short time.

Isaac started to high school in the fall of 1938. He liked taking pictures with his camera, of which he had a few in his lifetime. He was mechanically inclined so he kept the typewriting class with workable typewriters. He stayed in town with Mr. and Mrs. Archie Buesch to go to school for one year, I think.

The family of father, mother, and Isaac moved to town, and a nephew, Harold Barcus and his wife, moved to take care of the farm. I think they were in town for a year, and then decided they wanted to go back to farming. They moved back to the farm in the spring of the year.

Isaac did not go on to college, as his father thought he should help him on the farm, but Isaac said he didn't like farm work. Also his hip injury interfered. The doctor informed him that if he rode the tractor he would be in a wheelchair in a short time. So I thought after I got to know him, that he was a "Jack-of-all-trades, master of none." He had many jobs in his lifetime. A few of them are: helping his cousin Tom Barr in Land Construction, Fisher Firestone in '68, Bishop's, Kimball Implement in 1973-'74, school bus driver, custodian at Clarke County Court House, and electrician in houses. He worked on TVs and anything that had to do with them.

We had six children; Janice M.; George W., Francis Lee (Frank), Robert H:, Harry A:, and Gary P. All the children were actively involved in some aspect of the Osceola United Methodist Church. ,

We discovered that I was diabetic in 1989. Isaac and I had our 50th anniversary in August 1995. Isaac was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s in late January 2001.

Janice M. Barr, born in Osceola November 2, 1946, is the oldest and only daughter. She went to rural Knox #4 School west of our home for six years, and then the school was closed. The children were picked up by bus 'and taken to Weldon, Iowa to go to school there. She spent her seventh grade in Weldon, and then was bussed to Osceola for the eighth grade at West Ward School.

Janice attended high school for four years. While there she worked at Club Cafe on the north side of the square. She was active in 4-H for eight years. After graduation she went to Woodward, Iowa, where she worked in the hospital for the handicapped. It was there that she met Jerry Walker and married him. They were the parents of four kids. Janice divorced him and raised the children on her own.

She moved back to Osceola for awhile, then back to Woodward to work at the hospital. She met and married Charles Kirkpatrick. They moved to Madrid, Iowa, where she is living today (April 2002). She has ten grandchildren.

Our first son, George W. Barr, was born October 13, 1948. He also went to Knox #4 rural school, then to Weldon, to Osceola for seventh and eighth grades at West Ward, and on to high school. After he graduated, he went to Creston, Iowa to a trade school.

George went to work for a housing construction company in Indianola, and finally went to work for Osmose, a company that checks utility poles. This work has taken him over the central states, following the seasons from north to south. George has never married.

Francis Lee Barr (Frank) was born July 8, 1950, went to Knox #4 rural school, to Weldon, to Osceola East Elementary, and graduated from Clarke Community High School. He worked in housing construction in Indianola for two years, and joined the Army for two years. After leaving the Army, Francis had a job in Leon, Iowa, at an implement dealership, a similar job in Osceola and at Mueller Company in west Osceola. Francis met and married Eileen Jackson on September 1, 1990. They have three children and live on a farm on the Lacelle Road.

Robert H. Barr was born on September 29, 1954. He went to Weldon School for one year, to Osceola after we moved east of Osceola in June 1960. Robert was in the Army for five years then went to a school in Des Moines where he learned to work with computers. This work has been his career and it has taken him from Des Moines to California and New York, where, he is at the present time. Robert is not married.

Harry A. Barr was born July 29, 1957. He went to school at East Elementary, Osceola, Iowa. After graduating from high school, he went for one year to school in Creston, Iowa. He worked a year in Red Oak, went to Colorado in 1984, where he found a job as a car mechanic and worked there for 14 years. He met and married Crystal Erickson and they became the parents of three children. In June 1998, they moved back to Iowa and are now living east of Weldon, Iowa.

Gary P. Barr was born December 31, 1959. He went to school in Osceola from kindergarten through 12th grade. He then went to work with his brother George in the Osmose Company... Gary joined the Navy in April, 1983 and in April, 2003 will have been in the Navy for 20 years. While he was on the east coast, in Maryland, he met and married Pamela Fuller-on September 7, 1991. The marriage didn't work out and they were divorced in 1994.

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Even though Frances is home bound, she stays very active. She reads two library books a week, her embroidery work is near at hand, and with her electric typewriter, she keeps the records of the extended family, which need continual updating.

Over the weekend of May 5, 2002, Janice and husband, Charles Kirkpatrick, took Frances and Isaac to Cody, Wyoming for the funeral service of Frances' sister, Edna. Also attending were Frances’ sister-in-law, Gloria Whitehead, her son James and her daughter Louise Simco; as well as family members who live in Ellston-sister Annie, her daughter Dorothy and son-in-law Ray and his wife. Annie's daughter Kathy's husband, Ken Peterson, from Summum, Illinois, is a minister and had a part in the service.

Janice and Charles had come for Frances and Isaac on May 4. They went by way of South Dakota, Big Horn Mountain, going up the mountain and back down on switch-backs, with snow on the mountain sides. Janice had never been in the mountains so it was quite an experience. They stayed in South Dakota the first night and were in Cody the next day. The memorial service was at 11:00, followed by lunch. The family went back to the house before departing to return home. They came back through Casper and Cheyenne, Wyoming, saw Wind River Canyon, where the river flows backward. They took Charles home and were back in Osceola at 11:15 p.m., Tuesday May 6.

The sad news has been the doctor's determination that Isaac needs more care than Frances can give him, so the plan is that he will go into the Osceola Rehab Center. Janice and Frances will then clear out the house. Dismantling a home that has the memorabilia of 50 years of marriage is a heart rending task that, as of this writing, faces Frances and Janice.

By Janice:

While I am home helping Mom prepare to move out of the house my parents have lived in for 42 years, I will add my personal life to the story. I am grateful for the Family Medical Leave Act instituted by President Clinton. This gives me the opportunity to take a leave of absence from my job to care for my parents' needs and still receive pay. The time comes out of my vacation allotment, which is not a problem because I have many hours built up.

I am pleased to contribute my story to help the Osceola United Methodist Church which was an important part of my life all the while I lived in this area, but I had already been thinking of doing this for my children and grandchildren. I am not sure they can understand what it was like in the years when I was growing up. Life has changed so much, but I would like them to know about it.

I feel as though I lived in a time when there was a lot of transition. Life was simpler before the "little" had to give way to the big." Lacelle was a community then. Osceola was "the big city." We got groceries and gas at the Lacelle store run by Mrs. Florence Benbow, Galen Benbow's mother. Of course, what we bought were mostly staples because we had fresh garden products, milk from our cows, homemade butter from the cream, and eggs that we gathered from the hens. We had our own beef and pork that was butchered from our animals.

Every once in awhile the whole family went to the store and we got Hi-Ho pop. I remember that I chose orange, George and Mom liked grape, and I think Dad liked strawberry.

We went to the Methodist Church that was just behind the store. We went practically every Sunday to Sunday School and church. Dad usually took us. Mom didn't drive a lot. Mom gave us gum during church and maybe a little toy to keep us quiet. I remember especially one of our teachers-Connie Hunt, who had long blond hair; She was so pretty and a good teacher. Her sister Rosemary helped occasionally, too.

We used to have card parties for birthdays for Mom's side of the family. They played progressive pitch and I thought it was something special when I got old enough to play with them. There were no babysitters in those days. One time my Aunt Annie Files and cousin Lois Alley came and took care of us so Mom and Dad could take a vacation to South Dakota. I was too young to take care of all the kids.

I started my schooling at Knox #4, a country school. We knew everybody who was enrolled in the school, who shopped in the store, and who attended the church. It is so wonderful to remember those times, but they are gone and won't come back. And in case I give the impression that these things happened by magic, let me give the down side.

The store was probably about two miles away. Dad didn't always take us so we used to walk in all seasons in all kinds of weather to get the groceries and carry them back home. The milk we enjoyed involved getting the cows out of the pasture, and the folks milked 28 cows. They were big animals and not particularly inclined to come running the minute they saw us. One time they got a disease, and we had to dispose of about 18 of them. It left us with about 10. Mom went with us when we were smaller but one time she didn't and we didn't get back on time. We were playing in the creek, jumping off the rocks into the water. Mom came with a switch-I doubt that she used it on us, but it told us she meant business. It was time to milk the, cows, not to be playing around

When Mom got through milking, we had to separate the milk from the cream. The separator had to be cranked and the boys and I took turns doing that. We had to collect eggs, slop the hogs, and hay the cows. As we got older we helped in the hay fields. We had "hayhands," fellows that came to help-usually relatives-but we put hay in the haymow and stuff like that. We had a baler and I remember throwing the bales up on the hayrack.

I usually had to take my turn getting the eggs and I didn't like it. The darned hens pecked me. I think they knew I was scared of them and that is why they did it. Making our own butter wasn't all fun. I remember cranking that darned jar. It sometimes took a long time. The boys and I took turns because our little arms got tired. There would come a point when it got so thick that we couldn't turn it any more and Mom would have to finish.

When I went to Knox #4 to school there was only one other classmate, Rhonda Neff. Mom would take us to school, but we would have to walk home. On the way there was a windmill that creaked and squeaked and scared me to death, especially if I had to walk home by myself. I was a chicken when I was a kid.

But in spite of all that may seem negative, my life was better because of it. We appreciated the things we had to work for. We knew how they came to be. We couldn't go to a refrigerator to take out a bottle of pop or get some ice cream-they aren't a treat now like they were for us. We were disciplined when we needed it. With today's strict abuse laws our punishment might have gotten Dad into trouble, but lots of kids got the belt and switches back then, and it wasn't all bad. It showed us who was the boss and taught us respect.

There are some things I don't remember but have been told. When I was a baby, our family lived southwest of Osceola. Mom referred to a third house. While it was being built, my parents and I lived in a chicken house. When I was slightly older, I guess that one night when our parents were milking cows, we kids-I'm not sure which ones of us-found a coat hanger that had been straightened. A knob had come off the electric stove and we stuck the end of the coat hanger in the hole, which caused the lights to go off. It left our parents in the dark in the barn. It scared everybody. They came running to the house to see what had happened. We were all bawling and screaming in the dark. They found the problem and turned the lights back on. I suppose it wasn't very funny then, but it is fun to think back on it how.

While I was in Knox #4, Frank, George and I all had measles at the same time. In those days it was important to stay in a dark room, but our parents had to do chores at our farm as well as milking cows for Grandpa Barr. They would milk our three or four and then go to Grandpa's. He had about 28 cows but had an electric milker so that helped. While they were gone we kids saw our opportunity and left our bedroom to play all over the house. They weren't gone a long time and we seemed to suffer no ill effects.

After Grandpa Barr died, our family moved into his four-room house and Grandma Barr moved into "the house on the hill." This move was the one Mom referred to as the fourth house. Four rooms for that many people made for lots of adjustments. Frank, George, and Robert had a room. I had a room but in the winter, we didn't want Grandma to stay by herself, so I had to share my bedroom with Grandma. We'd take her home when day came. Mom and Dad's bed was in the living room, which didn't leave much room for toys or anything else.

I suppose there are some parts of my life that were unusual because I was the only girl in a family of boys. They weren't interested in playing dolls and pushing my doll carriage, so I joined in their fun. We climbed trees and jumped out of them. I'd play with their cars. We used to play in the haymow getting all itchy from the hay. Then we'd jump down and climb back up the ladder to do it again.

We had a tire swing between the barn and the house and we spent lots of time on that. We played in the mud. There was a puddle in the driveway and one time we got so muddy Mom wouldn't even let us in the house. She took a garden hose to us, and it was cold water! I used to make mud pies and try to get my brothers to eat them. We’d fight. George and I particularly fought, pulling each other’s hair. I'm surprised we even speak to each other.

There was a time when Robert got mad at somebody and wanted to run away. We all had to go looking. There was a creek that ran through our land and Mom took us down the hill to the bridge. There he was hiding under the bridge. He got punished, the little squirt.

In the summertime sometimes we would get to go to Grandma's-like when Mom had a new baby. Grandma had a player piano and I remember trying to reach the pedals, which I couldn't do. But Grandma would play and we would sing-I loved to sing and still do. Also we would get to listen to records on the old Edison. She let us wind it up, but she made sure we didn't wind it too tight.

My Aunt Edna, who just died, was from Wyoming. She would come sometimes and stay at Grandma Whitehead's. There were times when my cousins from Wyoming came, too; we had twin cousins from Glenwood and cousins from Murray who came. We were all about the same age and all got to stay together. That was a blast. We'd play Spoons, Crazy Eight, Go Fish, or. we'd play baseball, and we often had homemade ice cream.

It was quite a shock after I'd gone through the sixth grade in Knox #4, to go to Weldon for seventh grade. Of course there was a whole bunch of new kids. Rhonda met new friends but I was too shy to try to communicate. To me it was pretty scary. That was when we moved to the east side of Osceola. For eighth grade, I was in West Ward, behind the post office, west of the water tower. I was in high school when Robert started school. I remember taking each of the boys, Harry, Gary, and Robert to their first days of kindergarten. The bus picked us up and then waited while I took them in to the classroom. In high school I was in chorus and FHA (Future Homemakers of America). I was in 4-H from age 10 clear through high school. I learned to sew, cook, and refinish furniture with the help of 4-H leaders and Mom-mostly Mom.

We went to the Methodist Church in Osceola, first to the old church. That was where I took classes, was baptized, joined the church, and sang in the choir.

Until I graduated from high school, there had only been one time when I was away from home overnight without my parents. That was when my Dad was flying Piper Cubs and flew me to visit a cousin on his side of the family in Clarinda. I stayed for a week or ten days. Barbara and I did lots of things together. We did chores, and played. I learned to ride a horse. One bad thing happened. I stepped out of the barn onto a kitten. I don't know if I killed it, and because it was a big farm I suppose they had dozens of cats, but it made me very sad.

When I graduated, my Sunday school teacher took me to get my first job at Woodward. That started my career of taking care of mentally retarded people. When I got the job, Mom and Dad took me to Woodward and I lived at the E-home. My job involved housekeeping, folding clothes, sweeping and mopping floors, but mainly it was taking care of adults who were unable to take care of themselves. They fed themselves but had to be taken to the bathroom and bathed. They would bite, pull hair, and fight us. I was put on the worst women's ward, and it was an education.

The first time I worked there for a year and three months. Then I got married, had two children, and worked three more years, during which time I had two more children. That time I worked with guys who were all bed-ridden. Then I stayed home to take care of my children and returned again when I had two left at home. I have been there 14 years this last time.

Some great changes have been made over the length of time I have been there. Now instead of being housed in one large building, there are living units with 16 clients to a unit. In 1985, the State required that they learn to do things. They cannot just be cared for. They learn how to package, shred paper, etc. It has been amazing to me to discover that some of these people could actually learn. One girl was there when I began in 1965 and is still there. She has learned to sort by colors, to feed herself more properly in the new dining program, and such things. Institutions are much different now. They are learning opportunities.

Lots of people wonder how we can work there. They often say, "You must be very special to work with this kind of people." It is interesting to realize how much this job and these clients mean to me. If it came to hard times, if I didn't get as much money or any money, I would still take care of them. I have been in the same unit now for 12 years. Four guys have been there practically the whole time, and we have formed a relationship. They don't talk. They can't tell me how they feel, but you learn to tell by their actions. It is a joy to work with them.

After my divorce, I raised my four kids as a single parent. It wasn't easy, but you keep plugging away and try to raise them the right way. They were in baseball; they went to church and Sunday school, and to Vacation Bible School. There were times they tried to defy that, but for all our hard times they turned out really good. Tom was married and divorced and has twin daughters. He lives in Chicago and works in a loan department of a car dealership. He is trying to make his life better. He goes to church every Sunday and is showing his mother that what she tried to teach him "took."

Tim lives in Galesburg, Illinois. Life is not easy at this time. He is not married but has a fiancé and things should be looking up.

Andy lives in Leon, has four boys and another due any day. Kris and he met at school in Woodward. He has been in the service and has had other jobs but now is a policeman and loves it. The Bible and their church are very much a part of their lives.

Amanda is married to Duane Richardson, and they have two boys and a girl. They live in St. Joseph, Missouri. They are going to be moving into a Habitat House that they have helped build. Amanda has put a lot of hours into it. Duane works for Quest Phone Company. Both Kris and Amanda are stay-at-home Moms.

I am now very happily married to Chuck whom I met when I went back to work at the hospital in 1987. He had been widowed. He worked at Firestone, but had to take a medical disability when he was hurt on the job. He has been retired for two years. We go camping and fishing and try to enjoy life, with all our kids and grandchildren. He has three children and five grandchildren. They live closer to us than mine. His second son lives right next door and his youngest daughter lives in Jewel, Iowa, about an hour away. His oldest is in Des Moines. Chuck and I spoil them whenever we can.